an update on my baby girl.

Tags

cancer, chemo, chemotherapy, dog cancer, dogs, encouragement, faith, friendships, God, love, pets, Philippians, postaday2011, postaweek2011, prayer, thankfulness

A few days ago, I posted about Twizzler and her battle with cancer. (You can view that post here.) Many of you have been asking..on Facebook, G-chat, Twitter, through e-mail, etc.. so I figured I would give a brief update on how Twizzler is doing.

She started a new treatment plan and so far, she seems to be responding quite well to it. She’s not back in remission yet, but is definitely on her way there. Her lymph nodes have slowly decreased in size to the point where they’re almost completely back to normal. Her oncologist seems hopeful, as long as her tests continue to come back positive. Praise God!

We were deeply concerned with her irregular breathing, but her heart and lungs seem to be working properly again. Her breathing may have been hindered due to her enlarged lymph nodes putting pressure on her trachea. So, as her lymph nodes have decreased, her breathing has seemed to get better.  Both her white and red blood cell counts came back normal, which is a wonderful thing! If those are off event he slightest bit, she cannot receive her chemo treatments. So, thankfully we were able to continue with this new treatment plan. We were also concerned by her dramatic weight loss. My dad came over the other day and made a comment about how it looked like we were starving her to death. We’re feeding her, I promise. For the most part, she eats all of her meals (especially with the help of some yummy additives); she just doesn’t seem to retain the weight, but it doesn’t seem to be of concern to the doctors. They seem to think that as the chemo continues her work, her weight will pick back up. Fingers crossed!

a cold day in hell.

Tags

hell, husband, Philippians, postaday2011, race, running

I can’t be thankful enough that today is over. The 15k this morning was absolutely brutal. And I really have no intention of ever running that race again.

Not only was it freezing outside, but we also got a late start. I guess that’s what ya get for running behind. And the cherry on top that made this day even more wonderful… I pulled my hamstring in the middle of the race and heard a pop in my knee around mile eight. I have never been in so much pain during a race. I can’t tell you how many times I told Chris how badly I wanted to quit. I wouldn’t wish that pain on my worst enemy.

To be honest, I’m not even sure how I managed to cross the finish line. I tried praying throughout the run, but all I could think about was how frozen I felt. If you know me at all, you know I get cold very easily. I have my heated mattress on high 365 days a year. So today was unbearable for me to say the least. But somehow I made it the entire 9.3 miles without crying. 🙂

Right after I hurt my knee, I kept saying Philippians 4:13 over and over. I didn’t care at that point what place I finished in..I just wanted to finish the darn thing in one piece. I’m so thankful that I found the strength to stick it out and that I didn’t get hurt any more than I did. I saw plenty of people quit at various points in the race, but I’m no quitter and even if I wanted to Chris wouldn’t have let me. He would have said something like “What doesn’t kill ya, only makes you stronger” or “Pain is only temporary, victory is forever.” It would have annoyed me, but he would have been right. I am so blessed to have such a wonderful husband who never left my side and kept encouraging me throughout the race to keep going.

Today was a clear picture of what a cold day in hell would be like for me. And it will be a true cold day in hell when I run that stupid race again.

an anxious heart.

Tags

anxiety, cancer, chemotherapy, dogs, faith, Fetch, FETCH a Cure, financial aid, Philippians, postaday2011

Philippians 4:6-7 says, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

This past Monday, Chris and I were supposed to find out if we were granted the financial aid through FETCH a Cure for Twizzler’s chemotherapy. Fetch is a non-profit organization that works on behalf of pets and their owners who are being affected by cancer. Through the organization, they have a Companions in Crisis program which helps provide financial assistance for cancer treatment of affected dogs whose families cannot afford it otherwise. In return, the families dedicate a certain amount of time each month to volunteering at various events Fetch holds. (To learn more about this amazing organization, go to: http://fetchacure.com/)

Anyways, as soon as Twizzler was officially diagnosed we prepared our application and sent it in. We were notified by e-mail last week that we would receive a phone call on Monday with the specifics as to how they could help. Well… as we all know, Monday has come and gone and so as Tuesday. And I doubt we’ll receive a phone call today, considering it’s almost three o’clock.

I’m really trying not to be anxious, really I am. But it’s so hard. I’ve been praying continually for this and I really just want to know…good or bad, I just need to know. I know God’s hand is on our situation and will provide for us as He sees necessary, but that doesn’t stop the human part of me from freaking out.

Have you ever been in a situation similar to this one… where nothing seems to help your anxiety? How did you deal with it?